I Need A Vacation

I am crashing BIGTIME today! The Hubby suggested I call in this morning, but, unfortunately, I'm on a final for attendance (remember sick days count as an absense, as do the times I've came in late because car trouble - and they stay on for a year). So I'm stuck here at work. I know, I know, why don't I talk to my boss, or my bosses boss - see if they can wrangle me some time off? I guess I consider it a weakness. I should be able to handle this. Oh, and I don't want to bother anybody. Yeah, I also know I probably should be on an an antidepressant. I guess we need to go over this again. I can't take Welbutrin because I have a history of seizures (no, I don't have seizures anymore - well not often, and then only the blank stare variety). What has worked best for me is Lexapro. But last year, well, like a year and a half ago, the powers that be split prescriptions out from my health provider. Previously, it had a tiered approach, so much for generic on the formulary, so much for brand name on the formulary, so much for everything else. Well, now it's so much for generic on formulary, so much for brand on formulary, full price if not on formulary, and if you don't use their direct mail after a month you pay a percentage, not a copay.

This is what is on my prescription coverage's formulary:
The following are possible alternative(s) for « Lexapro »
Medication name
Fluoxetine HCl Paroxetine HCl Paxil CR Zoloft

I have now taken all of them. Paxil works, but excuse me if I didn't like the SIDE EFFECT, that didn't GO AWAY. And, yes this may be irrational, I just don't like the idea of throwing pills at a problem.

I could just scream. All I want to do is use some of the 48 hours of vacation time I have to use THIS MONTH, or else I won't accrue any until my vacation time is under 40 hours. I DO NOT WANT TO BE AT WORK TODAY!!!

Oh, and to calm any fears, I am not suicidal (today). I may not see a point to being alive, but I am.

**UPDATE**
I have been given A vacation day tomorrow!!! One down,seven or so to go!