As September comes to a close, let me do what I do best, obsess about myself.

Well, I may be getting unemployment, I should know by next week. And, since my period just ended, and PMS not yet begun, I actually feel....ok, not great, but ok. I DO have a job interview next week, and, yes, the thought of which is freaking me out. You know, I don't know if I want this position, I think I'd like the Library Tech position I'm interviewing for on Oct. 19 better. I still think working in a library, even if it's for the blind and disabled would be sooo cool! The hubby says I shouldn't mention depression at all, I should say I was concerned about my husband's illness, upset that he'll never get better. I said "I'm not good at lying." He told me it wasn't a lie. Then, why does it feel like it? And, how am I supposed to get over the feeling that it doesn't matter how well I can do the job, if I'm an incompetent interviewee. The interview is the all important thing.

The electricity got shut off yesterday for about 30 minutes. I didn't have close to the whole bill, but enough to pay the over-overdue portion. I guess the gas and phone will be next. And I also guess I'm no longer getting food stamps. One thing I've discovered, is that food stamps (actually an electronic card) are great! It was wonderful not having to worry about how you're going to buy food! There should be no shame involved at all! If you need it, it's there! Use it! I think the Hubby should be the one to go to the DHS to complain about not getting it anymore. He is the one on disability. And since my shyness right now is bordering on social phobia, it's almost impossible for me. Well, that's my excuse.

Politics has become impossible to talk about - me and the Hubby are 180 degrees away from each other. But basically only on Iraq and Bush. And geez, I hate confrontation. I got that from my first marriage, I guess.

I would still like to get the 5 or so stories out of my head, but I don't know how, or if they're any good. I'd like to talk to someone, a writer or so, about it, but that's another thing I get squeemish about (see shyness comment above).

Gotta go now. More later.